Online Parent Support Chat

Are giving consequences the only thing I can do?

Parents_Support_One_Another_@_MyOutOfControlTeen_com/support =

I need help with the following issue:

Mark, I posted in the chat under anonymous users 472 and 279. I am the one with the 16 yr. old who wouldn't talk for 34 days because I took his computer away for being hitting his sister (13) and myself. Well, he now has hit her door so hard it broke her mirror on the other side simply because she didn't answer him fast enough. He wanted to use the phone and she had it. He has a cell phone and we have another phone in the house. He looked for those phones for "2 minutes" he said, but he said he was justified at being so angry at her because "she had the phone and wouldn't answer him when he wanted it." When I asked him about forgetting her and looking further to find the other phone in the house or his phone in his room, he said it didn't matter. His main thing was that he thought she should have given the phone to him right away. He said he wasn't going to replace the mirror. He started cursing and crying and getting angry again and stormed out of the house tonight when I took his laptop away. I told him I would do that the next time he was physically agressive. Neither parent was home at the time this happened. I was calm and was the mediator to hear both kids talk about what happened. What do I do with such anger from him? He will not go to therapy. He's like a walking time bomb. What happens if he cannot see that his anger is a problem and blames everything on everyone else? Are giving consequences the only thing I can do?

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I think you should have him evaluated by a psychiatrist to rule out ODD or CD.

Anonymous said...

I think this is a site for parents to provide feedback to one another. If you want an answer from Mark directly, you should probably email him. All these problems that you mentioned are addressed in his his ebook and videos. Have you gone through the program?

Anonymous said...

You should email Mark on this one. But it sounds like you are in a power struggle with him.

Anonymous said...

Consequences would be the best approach -- BUT only after you have re-established trust with your son. Consequences won't work without a bond -- re-bond!