How do you discipline your children? Do you do time out? Do you spank? What if it's in public? Then what do you do if they're throwing a screaming fit?
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6 comments:
I've abandoned a full cart once before due to a ridiculous temper tantrum, which ended up being great b/c I had things in the cart for her which she of course didn't get. She never pulled that again.
I've mastered a really good "mom" look, which I must say works really well. If she defies me, I will threaten to spank but rarely need to. The threat of it alone is enough to deter her.
I count to 3 I only have to get to 2 before she's doing what I want her to do. (truth be told, sometimes I'm not sure what I'll do if I make it to 3 but she's never pushed me that far lol)
For things that she does that are beyond a warning, I have found that grounding her from toys/tv/movies is really effective.
The spanking is something I'm not opposed to but I don't need to use it all the time either. It's more of a last resort.
i let him cry and tell him that as soon as we get to the car he is going to get a spanking. i would never spank my kid in public because people may take it the wrong way. i will talk to him firmly in public though.
i hate spanking my son though. i feel bad doing it usually i give time outs. i make him sit in his room until he calms down.
time out - in public - how does that work?
in public, if the kid is wildin' out , it's @ss whoopin' time and that better be the end of it - if it get's worse after that I just snatched the kid up, abandon my cart in the store and left.
it only happened a very few times, after that, all it took was a look.... you know one.
I'll keep how I discipline him to myself, but I will say that it's consistent and never hidden if we're in public. If I can't discipline him in public, there's something wrong - most likely with my tactic. Besides, waiting to punish a young child makes the punishment less effective.
*EDIT* Miss Coffee, I did the same thing! OK, the cat is out of the bag now. =) The one tantrum he had, I just stuck him in the corner. He pouted up at me, but he quieted down immediately.
I do a lot of redirection. I do time outs at home, and when we are in public I lay down the law.(It is my way and that will be the end of the discussion or she can sit in her stroller or trolley at the supermarket).if my child starts crying I let her cry and keep doing what I need to do or we leave and go home. My daughter is 2 so if she is that bad at a store then I did not do something right (I kept her out to late, did not feed her enough or she did not get a nap..etc.) I make no apologies for crying babies but I also make sure that I praise her when she is doing a good job at being a good girl and I point our all the good kids too her so that way she learns good behavior.
Time out can work if you are consistent. As far as spanking goes, in general it doesn't work. I also hate to see kids getting spanked in public. To me, if you are going to spank, it should not be done in anger and should be done privately. You can also get creative. Make the kids do chores or take away their baby dolls. Or put their favorite blanket in time out for 10 minutes. Whatever gets to them. There is a good article about time out below. Keep in mind that time out is really a time out of the loving attention of a parent. So time out won't work as well if the parent is not attentive to the child. Think of time out as an umbrella blocking the glowing, loving sunrays of a parent's love. The child must WANT to get back into the warmth of the sun badly for the time out idea to work well.
As far as in public, if a kid is freaking out at the store, 8 times out of 10, it is the parent's fault. Most kids can only be out shopping for an hour or so when they are little. Longer than that and they are bored. If they will be out longer than that, they need to have toys or something to do. Also, when kids are sick, or hungry, or tired, parents have no business having them out. I have had my kid out before when she really needed a nap, and yes, I was frustrated at her, but at the same time, I knew it was my fault that she was having a break down. She needed to be at home having her nap.
You also, as a parent, need to set expectations before you go into a store. Kids need to know that they won't be getting anything on a trip. They also need to have strict rules in a store. No running, no picking things off the shelf, etc. My kids do ask for things, but they usually don't get them. They usually are fine with that because they knew going in that it was just a trip to get the things on the list.
You also need to involve kids, especially preschoolers, in the shopping trip. I let my daughter check items off of the list, help me pick out fruit, and make some decisions along the way, like, "apple juice or grape juice, or strawberry yogurt or vanilla yogurt"... choices I don't really care about.
The key to keeping kids in line when you are out is prevention. And if worse comes to worse, you have to be prepared to leave your cart of stuff or checkout quickly and go home.
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