I have an out of control 16 year old son who defies us on everything, we ask him to do something as simple as walk the dog and it turns into a full fledge argument and he states "we can't make him" What do I do?
2 comments:
Anonymous
said...
anger management classes. also no computer. and dont let him "wait u out." just dont give it back permanently. not until he is consistent with his attitude and helping out around the house. think of it as putting him on lock down bc with the way his behavior is progressing he will be in a real prison soon (and that is much worse than any sort of lock down u can do to him) so take away everything except food, shelter, and love and wait it out.
When i was 16 i became very defiant and out of control because i was dealing with issues i felt like i couldn't talk to my parents about. Take the time to consider what is happening in your sons personal/social life. Talk to his teachers or school counselor. This is such a vulnerable time, usually for girls, but your son could be dealing with a lot of peer pressure, bullying or violence at school that is causing him to act out at home where he feels like he has more control over the situation.
Has something happened to your son that he is hiding with his bad behavior? Consider the inconsiderable. Something very traumatic (rape, addiction, this new huffing trend) could have taken over his life.
Before you start blaming yourself, you should confront the issues above. Become a private detective. Look deeper into your sons life to see where the root of his problems are coming from WITHOUT ignoring the possibility that something you may not want to deal with is to blame. Get help from school counselors or even a regular counselor. Find a great mentor for your son through Big Brothers and Big Sisters of America before he turns 14 and reaches the age limit. Don't rule out depression.
2 comments:
anger management classes. also no computer. and dont let him "wait u out." just dont give it back permanently. not until he is consistent with his attitude and helping out around the house. think of it as putting him on lock down bc with the way his behavior is progressing he will be in a real prison soon (and that is much worse than any sort of lock down u can do to him) so take away everything except food, shelter, and love and wait it out.
When i was 16 i became very defiant and out of control because i was dealing with issues i felt like i couldn't talk to my parents about. Take the time to consider what is happening in your sons personal/social life. Talk to his teachers or school counselor. This is such a vulnerable time, usually for girls, but your son could be dealing with a lot of peer pressure, bullying or violence at school that is causing him to act out at home where he feels like he has more control over the situation.
Has something happened to your son that he is hiding with his bad behavior? Consider the inconsiderable. Something very traumatic (rape, addiction, this new huffing trend) could have taken over his life.
Before you start blaming yourself, you should confront the issues above. Become a private detective. Look deeper into your sons life to see where the root of his problems are coming from WITHOUT ignoring the possibility that something you may not want to deal with is to blame. Get help from school counselors or even a regular counselor. Find a great mentor for your son through Big Brothers and Big Sisters of America before he turns 14 and reaches the age limit. Don't rule out depression.
Post a Comment