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Re: How to help her understand that this is her new life and she should start getting on with it...

Parents Support One Another @ = I need help with the following issue:

We recently moved away from our home in Canada (where my 15 year old daughter has spent her entire life) to a new home in Europe. It's an exciting opportunity for our family that is being ruined by our daughter's bad attitude. We also have a 16 year old daughter who's making the most of the opportunity.

10 months ago our 15 year old started hanging out with a bad crowd, and 'fell in love' with a poor choice of boyfriend (run-ins with the police, bad home situation, school drop out...)

we felt this move would be a chance for her to 're-set' and to move on to more exciting things but our daughter is SO angry at us. Her attitude is terrible, she swears and won't get involved in any of our activities. I'm sure she's not doing great in school but won't ask for extra help.

Her strongest desire at this point is to be sent home to finish school there but I don't want her to go back - I think it would be a recipe for disaster!

I'm looking for any and all advice re: how to help her understand that this is her new life and she should start getting on with it.

Many thanks,

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Although moving has become a
common event for American
families, it is a “moving” experi-
ence in more ways than one. No
matter how often families change
residence, moving brings with it a
variety of emotions and situations.
One out of five American fami-
lies moves each year, and most
of those moves are within the
same community or to a neigh-
boring state.
Moving can be an exciting
adventure for families as they look
forward to new places, friends, and
neighbors. Many families find that
the experience of moving often
brings them closer.
The general sense of confusion
and disorder can make moving
both physically and emotionally
stressful. While packing, moving,
dusting, and sorting take a toll on
energy and attention, short tempers
and chaos drain the emotions.
There is also an element of grief.
No matter how eager you are to move there will be places, things,
and people you will miss. When
moving is brought about by a
death, divorce, or job loss, the sense
of loss and sadness is more acute.
Sometimes, a combination of the
exciting prospect of moving and
the sense of loss that the same
change could bring produces a see-
saw of emotions. Many family
members experience emotional ups
and downs.
Moving is a challenging and
difficult experience for a family,
especially for children. It is natural,
therefore, for parents to be con-
cerned about the effect of the move.
Parents often wish to help ease the
transition for their children and
make moving a positive experience.
When faced with a move, it is
important to remember
that reactions from
children will vary
depending on their
personality and devel-
opmental age The personality of the child is
important because it influences the
time a child may take to adjust to
the move. Some children are
naturally outgoing and will be able
to make friends immediately while
some other children may take
Some aspects of the child’s
personality may tend to get more
pronounced. For instance, if your
child tends to worry and get ner-
vous, you are likely to see more of
this behavior until the child begins
to feel more comfortable in the new
surroundings. Roller coaster
emotions are not