It's not always about changing the child's behavior?

It's not always about changing the child's behavior? I see so many questions on here about how someone's child is doing this or that and how to punish it, or how to change their behavior.

Don't parents realize that sometimes it's not about punishing the child? Don't parents realize that sometimes they need to change their own behavior in order to change the child's?

Most behavior happens for a reason, wouldn't it be better, as a parent, to figure out WHY the child is acting a certain way and then make adjustments? For example sometimes kids act out for attention like when a new baby is born. I see many parents come on and want to know how to punish the behavior. How about spending more one on one time with the child so they won't crave attention? That's just an example but there are many times when a parent can change their child's unwanted behavior by changing their own.

There are also times when a parent can change a child's unwanted reaction (temper tantrum for example) by changing how they approach a situation they know might cause a tantrum. So my question is, why do so many parents focus on changing their child's behavior once it happens with punishment and overlook the fact that they could change it by changing their own behavior, or even prevent it by changing their own approach, etc...? So many parents just try one punishment after the other and can't figure out why nothing is working....possibly they need to look into their own ways for the answer. As a parent do you try and look deeper into your child's behavior for answers to why they might be acting that way and then fix the underlining problem or do you tend to look focus on how to punish unwanted behavior once it happens? Of course punishment is necessary sometimes, obviously I'm not saying disregard punishment.

Online Parent Support